Next week’s Curator describes himself as ”Your crooked guide to the Swedish suburbian safari.” Starting Monday morning!
Oops, HERE is the Swedish secret of doom http://t.co/U94xMR3e
Now – bye folks!
Here it is, the Swedish secret of doom: http://t.co/lqWVwwvP
I want to end this beautiful week with reveal Swedens most well-kept secret, a dark, terrible fact of awe that weve been protecting for ages
If you understand swedish and still think I’m remotely interesting, follow me on @kwasbeb. I’ll be just as childish and stupid over there.
I’ve had a blast the last week, an I hope you haven’t become totally tired of my old man fart jokes. You guys are the best!
Ok folks. In five minutes, they’ll pull the plug on me. I guess this is good bye.
Some people just EATS your apartment with their body: http://t.co/lqWVwwvP
@StephenJBowron it sure is!
@cfs yeah that’ll only cost like one million kronor and I’ve got 12 on my account, can totally do it!
@debdobson probably Iceland. They’ve messed up before.
@aridux good night, thanks for this week!
@sticksxc lol wut?
@hildgrim I totally agree. Flawless reputation!
@RomanaCorreale oh there’s a lot of them! But Esbjörn Svenssons Trio and Detektivbyrån are two favorites – look them up!
@AllLoveForMiley I AM SWEDEN
@amanicdroid yeah that’s good but I’ll stick to rickroll. Thanks for the idea man!
@WWBugs the people behind this idea called me and asked if I wanted to. And that’s about it.
@gspenceruk creatig international awkwardness: my new life goal
@scaryduck thank you man for following me! It’s been my pleasure all the way
@MWRamsis I’m actually working with people reporting on the development in the MENA countries – so I’m doing my best!
@hildgrim I know them, great idea!
@richardfeigin next year!
@DukeKajaK thank you! Have yourself a great sunday evening!
@TrulyTherese jag vet, skickade ut en rättelse strax efteråt
@debdobson it must be them!
@aridux a computer game that’s really great. You should look it up on YouTube, search for ”portal ending song”
@JohanLange I might. Suggestions of good ones?
@odinmanzano great to hear that you like it!
@scaryduck that’s the second suggestion that I should declare war on someone I’ve got. Do I look that much as a Viking?
@amanicdroid I might actually go out with a rick roll…
@WWBugs I’m sure the following people will make me look like as interesting as a cheese sandwich, bro
@mbwilston1 thank you and thanks for following! Have a great Sunday night!
@olmjes go Sweden go, svärmor!
@uaberu the pleasure is totally on my side, friend!
@uaberu I’m way to tired. How about just drinking a glass of water and write dry tweets on the weather instead?
@yvas now that wouldn’t be very nice of me
@Wonder7orma oh that would be awesome but I’m sorry – the law of nature demands me to move on
@debdobson I guess we have a so called loose-loose situation here?
@gvunson Stockholm or the west coast, near Lysekil, easily!
@SpinelessLib man I’m way too tired. Otherwise I would totally have done it!
@gvunson and the same, dear!
@mikeerickson I’ll look for it on YouTube?
@karalombard I will contemplate all of your genius ideas, it’s just so hard to find out which the best one is!
@amanicdroid well that’s pretty much the most evil idea I’ve ever heard about
@indianhopp sorry, forgot about that! A highly valued Swedish tradition
@youngpacino my pleasure
@richardfeigin do you think people abroad are able to take part in that?
@Wikichipi haha love your logic. ”what’s the worst things there is? 2. Fapping on twitter 1. Justin Bieber”
@mbwilston1 dude, I’ve gained like 3000 followers the last two days, wouldn’t it be unnecessary to loose all of them now?
@kristinawig oh, you’re far too kind dear. Thank you, and take care!
@turbohat oh, my knowledge of what teachers that are needed in Swedish schools is limited, to say the least. But give it a shot?
@gavindeschutter thank, great to hear from you too! Upvotes for ever, my narwhal friend
@uaberu wow, that more like a day-long job. But it’s a great idea! I will look into it
@astonadam it’s not a job, it’s just a fun thing for a week. I got it cause the dudes behind the account found me fitting, I guess.
@yvas like start joking on Swedish?
@aridux oooh, I have a song suggestion: ending song from Portal 1. Heard it?
@AlexanderEdbom haha tack
@debdobson dark as hell. We have about five hours of sun time a day. It’s rather sad.
@ryanvoeller17 Chuck Norris
@StephenJBowron do you feel that’s a flawless trick ”to get the ladies queuing”, bro?
@MattGillian I’ll listen and try to find it out!
@nikiheden I will my friend, I will.
@amanicdroid do you mean that I should watch it, or you guys?
@mikeerickson sure! You’ve got any tips on good ones?
@itsmotherswork I wouldnt doubt it
@Britt_W welcome home!
@MajLev oh I’d love to – but I ain’t got no glögg!
@Wikichipi now that wouldn’t be very social media fresh, right?
@NikkiGuest I’d love to! Helvete=hell, snopp=dick, bajskorv=turd, rumphål=anus and ”det luktar prutt”=”it smells like fart”.
@debdobson Hey person not from Sweden! How are ya?
Anyone in Sweden wanna hire this dude: @kzelnio? He seems like a nice enough guy.
So, one hour and twenty minutes left on my time as the international twitter spokesman for Sweden. What should I do, you guys?
@GeniusRocket I’d say both. Or at least, I’ve succeeded in forfilling both during this week.
@AjlinaCor haha thats an awesome thought!
@JKSthlm it sure is!
@MattGillian uuh, I’d say like the techno, electro and dancehall people. Thats really an elite in their own.
@filmcore haha thank you! I would have to be reborn as princess Victorias kid though, and then I would have to die before she gave birth.
@creativemoore thank you, great tip!
@nemlawford haha love you too! Gotta represent, you know
@JosephChrostonB great to hear!
@VisitSwedenUK great to hear – I’m sure you’ll enjoy the next person up too
@FizaIsa yeah go us!
@joeltwitt hehe well you know, people enjoy watching car crashes…
@Esupersave absolutely, will do so from now on
@gvunson probably not, sadly. I’ve got a private twitter, but I only tweet in Swedish there though. But thanks for liking me, really!
@MsTeratophilia i guess. It’s like anal sex – probably really strange, but at least you should try cause you might be sick enough to like it
@MichaelWaring I think I covered most of it there, right?
@MsTeratophilia oh my god. I’m sorry but I can’t be held responsible for that. That sounds very very weird.
@yasmineelrafie nädå, men från 8000 till 11 000
Listening to my hungover friend Lydia explaining why The Notebook is such a bad movie: http://t.co/RHOW93hp
@scaryduck the official swedish view is: what’s the difference?
So, that pizza I was telling you guys about… http://t.co/CURVW7zA
@bollibolshevik all of it. I can follow and unfollow who I want, and tweet whatever I want (as long as, you know, its not totally fucked up)
@dakuten youre welcome! Good luck, and I hope to see you here speaking Swedish like a native some day!
@sweden_cul you do? That’s interesting! What kind of stuff do you tweet about?
@bollibolshevik you think so? Whats your country?
@OneandonlyHelen and you should be
@pjsullivan3 oh, I’m gonna have to try that out! Thanks for the tip
@uaberu probably pretty much. Maybe a bit worse English.
@uaberu we were Vikings. Every stone probably has a variation of that.
@joshleaves that’s bull shit! Both women- and manizers should get to represent their country. Or as in my case: snacksizers.
@uaberu mate, what are you talking about? We left tons of runestones down there back in the days, just find one and make a few minor changes
@GLiljegren hehe nöjet är helt och hållet på min sida
@uaberu oh come on won’t you guys at least raise a runestone to tell the tale of my life and death? I was a twitter king for a week, dammit!
@Lexeme that was supposed to go *aaw schuck*, as I’m sure you understand. And I’ll miss you too!
@Lexeme as shuck, now you make me blush.
@uaberu my hours on the throne is counted. Tonight, a coupe will overthrow me and make way for a new king of Twitter. And I will be forgot.
@Camand78 haha, sorry – love you too
@Camand78 well we live you to!
@ManInTheField nope. But they keep an eye on me, and if I crossed the line they would hunt me down and erase what godless stuff I’ve tweeted
@bollibolshevik yeah I’m just trying to keep an eye on my nations areas of interest, you know?
@CarolineCajo nope! Sorry, you’ll just have to wait
Wasting a day on pizza and BF3 is like masturbating: feels great while you’re at it, but later you’re like ”what am I doing with my life?”
@karalombard ok, that’ll be great
@MrHighFidelity you’re welcome, it’s my job this week. And I’m just having fun. Hope I’ll see you around here in Sweden anytime soon !
@GekkoPowere oh me to. It’s great that so many found this initiative that exciting!
@GekkoPowere oh, me to. It’s really great that so many found this initiative that exciting!
@hannamadelon yes! Spread the truth!
@dreamgor doing my best, promise!
@RSKingBohemian that’s wonderful, hope you’ll have the opportunity to visit again sometimes soon
@CarolineCajo thanks! Be sure to tag along longer – I think people taking over this account in the coming weeks may actually be interesting
@turlygod ain’t it?
@taip that’s awesome! But dude, you know that the dough that you make pepparkakor out of is way better then the actual pepparkakor, right?
@TravisCommGuy always welcome back, you know!
@Ekobonden ja, det hela är rätt anmärkningsvärt, eller hur?
@supimfabi sure – if you’ll hook me up on an oktoberfest?
@supimfabi if you bring me some döner?
@supimfabi course they do! Your döner kebab is the absolute best I’ve ever tasted
@supimfabi I just love you!
@gspenceruk haha bork bork you smart bastard
Picture in the last tweet collected from Reddit, btw. The best place on the web there is.
@karalombard oh, I understand your motif and its great – but the thing is, this twitter profile says who it his that temporarily control it.
@karalombard probably not! I think you can drop that (currently Jack)-thing, though. It’s pretty clear to most of our followers I think.
These Wikipedia top banners really creates fun opportunities for someone with a sense of humor like my own: http://t.co/8OYiuIzA
@karalombard i have no problems with a), but I’m afraid that b) would render you with mould in your letter box – hence, can’t do that c)
@karalombard I’d say that every woman represents that group, the same way me and every man represents the ”potential fat grumpy fart”-group
@ftorstensson de ringde mig och frågade, helt enkelt.
@AnnFollin oh really? Actually that would have been awesome, but I’m busy tomorrow. Thanks for inviting though!
@TzviShishler isn’t it?
@karalombard I think so, yes. I’d say you own the account for a week, and can do whatever you want with it.
@whoradio oh you did not! What did you say? Is there a possibility to listen to it online? For science, you know.
@karalombard and it’s been great getting to know you too!
@ftorstensson det är du säkert!
@DemonLlamas doing my best to delivar
@Jordstar I would so follow that account if they did that!
@karalombard yeah but then I wouldnt be able to drop bad jokes!
@EirikSS yeah, something like that
@martinid thank you, and the same!
@skjutsgruppen well, since I’m just in possession of this account til tomorrow evening, I guess that’ll be hard. But thanks for the offer!
@skjutsgruppen oh I know you guys, you’re great!
@EirikSS guess its the people behind the campaign choosing who gets to tweet.
@tungljurt only thing missing is you and Thomas
@Edie_Howe great to hear! Hope you’ll have a wonderful weekend and Christmas!
@LadyTealeaf eh, don’t know their name in English, but like saffron buns. Traditional Swedish Christmas bakery.
@Edie_Howe hi Edie from Missouri! Hope you’ll like what you see.
@parasomnist I pretty much am. And I’m having a great time representing Sweden.
@popinopka who doesn’t?
@jonnatolonen well I don’t know. I actually know pretty few Finns, but most of them are chilled-out. Do you know the Finnish rapper Gracias?
@mikeerickson yeah, last year was crazy snowy! This year, not so much.
@parasomnist hi Joshua. Having a nice weekend?
@AjlinaCor oh I see. That would have been very insensitive, I agree!
@robertohlen an equally silly word
@robertohlen an equally silly word
@juanpablorc thank you, and yes, you should!
@EirikSS yeah isn’t it?
@leonmail yeah, isn’t it? And it so fun as well. Greetings back to ya from you know where
Tried to win today’s Internet through a cute picture of my family’s cat, but he wasn’t really ok with it: http://t.co/VaEfFtlF
@thomps nej, men det är en bra grej! Kör den lite senare, tack
@LoukasX I’m sure I’ll be free! Just mail me at jack at kwasbeb dot se, and we’ll come up with a date
@popinopka and the same to you, dear!
@barsk well, being the twitter personality I am right now, that’s maybe not that remote?
@RichBranding yeah it’s probably a German word originally. Don’t you think it sounds silly?
@natlix like ”yuuh-le-tid”
Fully engaged in the Swedish traditional Christmas time (juletid) baking with the family – aren’t they adorable? http://t.co/NxRhhFfD
@NoBigGovDuh yeah I know, but that’s what some people think of me. And I think it’s only fair to tell new aquaitances that, don’t you?
Just so you know, ”juletid” is the over-the-top ridiculous Swedish word for ”Christmas time”. Use it wisely.
@zahramirafzali thank you – and the same
@Brosner85 thank you! It’s just stopped raining and started snowing instead, but I expect it to have melted away in like an hour or so.
@adigaskell I really am! Best time ever, everybody’s so kind and interested and all.
@idoitwellweb and you would be very welcome!
@HFridlund yeah there’s no arguing there
@MyCaricature me to. Actually, now it’s snowing though. But I don’t expect it to be all like winter wonderland in five minutes.
@KaysKayness I don’t know. I’d say like $30-$60
I guess these guys aren’t doing the best business this year: http://t.co/BiYzdM6i
@Unionbuster that’s not up to me, it’s the people behind this account who’s in charge.
@Unionbuster still me, dude. We take one week each, mine’s over tomorrow evening.
@TheRedBoscage reddit almost all of it
If I got to have this person as teacher, I’d go right back to school: http://t.co/teNEWzvr
@bieberdodah Stockholm och här är det bara regn
@bieberdodah inte där jag bor
@The_CheshireKat well I guess we could change for a week, as a win-win solution?
@The_CheshireKat ohhhh you should so try out a Christmas with snow! It’s an entirely different setting!
@EDDIEDURKAN jag vet inte om jag berätta det, nej. Vad är det svåra, att hitta bostad eller att trivas här?
@verselle it’s fucked up man
@mtsw well, they’re drunk and you can’t understand what they say at all, but otherwise sure
@mtsw yeah totally, but smaller. Such a lame thing to be.
@ivanbrezakbrkan absolutely! You can reach me on jack at kwasbeb dot se
@alphachung of course! How are you doing, friend?
@kristinawig but that’s me? And I’m telling you that you are the best!
@mtsw yeah, we’ve got a special bond going on here you and me, right? Well let me ask you then: what do you honestly think about Iceland?
@ivanbrezakbrkan thanks bro!
@mtsw actually it really did! Thank you dude
@ivanbrezakbrkan yup, or not part time, it’s more a non-profit fun thing for us tweeters.
@ElroyK thanks dude!
@michaelevans55 no you are, mate!
@ajlinacor yes, as the most honest pictures of night life often are. I think that’s why I like it, as a matter of fact!
@marite83 I barely don’t. But our summers are absolutely amazing, they totally make up for the winters.
@journeytv well I love you! Or, that is, by I love you I mean TV’s that play Journey songs all the time… Just to be clear….
@kristinawig no YOU are!
@ivanbrezakbrkan great fun! Everybody’s so supportive and humorous, it’s just great!
@xmoraix what?! On reimersholme it’s still raining. Stockholm ain’t that big
@bieberdodah what?! Where?
@momentumpll nah, I’d say the opposite. Why can’t we have a white Christmas?
So, I woke up and walked over to the window, just to discover it’s raining like crazy. This is how that makes me feel: http://t.co/4H3Hcob6
Well, that’s that for this hectic day. It’s 3 am in Sweden now, and I’m signing off. Thank you all for an awesome night – seeya tomorrow!
@edzpecial you should! And she should! A state-sponsored travelling agency that just served visitors of Sweden, I mean, now that’s an idea!
@bradgallen and the same to you!
@bradgallen haha I think I got that, just wanted to be a smart ass, sorry about that!
@edzpecial well welcome, friend!
@The_Jewggernaut no dude I’m half Jew myself, I’m allowed to joke about that stuff
@bradgallen that first sentence of yours could be misinterpreted, dude
A Facebook friend of mine captured tonights best pic, titled ”Stockholm metro wishes everybody a Merry Christmas!”: http://t.co/bGeueqVu
@petguineapiggy yeah actually that’s a good point
@EdLoh actually, we don’t have a really fitting equivalent. But I’d say ”skithäftigt” or something.
@Beelzebjorn indeed! We could almost jump directly to saying ”hej”, don’t you think?
@zachthefish haha, brothers in lonesome twitter maniacs, right?
This is really one of the best outcomes of my roaming here I’ve seen today, but you have to be a redditor to get it: http://t.co/LkA7SwfU
@Philosurfer85 I will, and you’re welcome dude!
@CH23_ well, eh… candy?
@River_Stream yeah I know but then you get that ”do I really want to identify myself with these people” feeling…
@gonzae that’s not a good sign, right?
@jonelf låt oss hoppas den bästisen inte får kontot, då
@msjennytruong no, neither is my top priorities for having a great night
@CH23_ no like DARK darkness. Like night, even though it’s day
@Jimpy_ lugnt. Jag är i twittermode nåt så in i helvete här.
@CH23_ well, right now, you’re actually not missing out. No snow. Rain. But dark 20 hours a day. Thats not a good december.
@adamsfuller yeah thats wussup!
@Jimpy_ jupp, turistbyråns officiella.
@belindasmilne oh but I tweet solely in english?
@AbFabSkyLife well thats a point…
Never understood the concept of clubs. You’re sweaty among people you don’t like, and that’s it. It’s like the concentration camps of fun.
@debdobson you would be so welcome as I’m sure you rock at least twice as much!
@missorian I told my girlfriend that and she totally bought it! I have a beer in my hand as we speak! Awesome!
@ohadsamet oh I’d love to. Mail me at jack at kwasbeb dot se, so I’ll remember it!
@LAeditor I think it is actually! Its a creole restaurant that serves amazing new Orleans inspired food. And the beer is bought!
@myalbino will do my best! Sweden loves you!
@RichBranding yes, I’ll ask!
@delilahjesinkey you should google ”twitter Sweden jack Werner”. You’ll find material in your language. Be sure to read Gizmodos piece.
@europopped it is though! Were totally lunatics, the lot of us!
@ohadsamet I see. No lol. What you got on your mind?
@thanatossassin thank you mate!
@River_Stream yeah I’m always doing that
@thatdavidhooper haha and be like ”see this iPhone? It’s not an iPhone – its a fucking private army! Stay back brah!”
@delilahjesinkey Sweden’s watching you…
@JoshVanSlam i would! But try explaining the value of social media transparency to a bunch of drunken bros, that’s not ideal.
@JoshVanSlam well i dont think most people here use Twitter, sadly
@JKSthlm yeah I’m huge now, right? I’m sure I’ll have get to have concerts at Barkarby Centrum all the time!
People think I’m a huge loser cause I’m standing lonely staring in my phone on a bar. But I don’t care. That’s how much I love you guys!
So, this is me and my girlfriend. We’re like, hi, good to meet you, uh, how are you doing. You, know, that kinda stuff: http://t.co/cyvdisJe
@martynadimonte hey czech!
So here we are, at Marie Laveau, one of Stockholms better restaurants/bars: http://t.co/tHNeadOe Whaddaya say, should I buy myself a beer?
@gvoakes hey Greg!
@thatdavidhooper yeah, kinda hectic right now to answer all, with mashable and all – but I’m trying my best with that as well
@thatdavidhooper ill try my best!
@RockTique and if you come here you can have it!
@nicksabin klart jag kan!
This has been my hangout today: the hostel ship Rygerfjord. It’s awesome, if you visit Stockholm you should stay there! http://t.co/lNhDYpuF
@mariaziv none! I’m as cool as always, cause I’m too stupid to be nervous.
I guess Mashable discovered us now. A bit hectic over here. I think I’ll just go buy myself a beer.
@missorian lol no, what’s it about?
@mysteryaction even better (stranger)!
@Robo_Nixon winter is coming…
@RichBranding all rigth, will do
@mysteryaction your, good sir, have a really interesting taste if it’s me and Abba that’s your favourite things about Sweden
@missorian dude no way Jose(fina, i mean, you’re a girl, you know…)
@JoshGeyer no you rock for liking it!
@maria_eriksson aaah! You’re so kind!
So, things are starting to cool down now. So what do you say, should I like go out and have a beer and report to you about what happens?
@3454PennAve easily! Just gimme a shout and I’ll be there
@TheRedBoscage yay! Youre the first one to understand!
@glennrice no? Ok, no.
Hey guys, when does the narwhal bacon?
@MyCaricature always welcome!
@squidwardspeaks I’ll answer you in a ”crazy ass motherfucker”-manner: heck yeah, you’re darn tootin’!
@willsdissolve aww, you’re far too kind! Have a great day man!
@gustavop yeah, I really want to!
@RunonAwesome personally I love it! like a greek drama, with familys falling apart in front of your eyes.
@sennbrink åh förlåt, men du måste missförstått: jag svarar bara på frågor om Sverige.
@jacobn97 mission accomplished!
@puneet86 surely someone who’s at least as silly as I’m!
@TheRealPWB with the woorld, mama
@mieky hi Mike!
@RickardSjoden eh, en spänn? *spänner min armmuskel*
@bosilva hi Bruno, hi Brazil! I feel the same man, have a great day!
I absolutely love @gizmodo‘s head line on me. This is just how I imagined getting my international break-through: like an avid masturbator.
@HannaHales yeah you should eat at Marie Laveu, shop in sofo and have a coffee at drop coffee, mariatorget. Google it for more info!
Im boycotting smileys, since they are to your language what drugs can be to your life: fun first, but all of a sudden you’re just disgusting
@tingan that’s a great pic, right?
@Gyro321 well I don’t like apple pie either? Or is that some kind of secret language for something?
@BenPerLee I know, that’s like a parody. Or ”Bernt”. Or ”Sigvard” or ”Fjörksump”. Actually, I just made that last one up myself.
@camilla_loyolla Södermalm, south part of town, easily! Great food, great folks, great everything. You should stay on the hostel Rygerfjord!
@MrCiels somewhat. I mean, it wouldn’t kill me with some more snow but what the heck.
@BenPerLee dude, thanks! You are already, writing tweets like that.
@Gyro321 nah, I’m kinda cool. I think Iran is like an emo kid: misunderstood and thus angry at everybody.
@wannabechef91 aaaaah haaaaa haaaa
@ljkropp well, there’s always that I guess. But still, you would get the same in your own fridge…
@CertainlySocial you should! It’s great fun
@lopec en smula va
@aka_Pingu haha underbart!
@noemimones and you’re always welcome, dear!
@AndyChalk wow, awesome!
@AndrewBrackin well, no, we already got one. But I guess you might say ”head geek”, or something.
@Jos_Jacob it’s great but rainy. Ordinarily, it’s snowing now but now it’s not, it sucks. Well, I’m thinking about getting drunk.
@CertainlySocial so am I, trust me!
@jasonLLoren and now it’s in your braaiiinnnnnn
@MrCiels great, Brit! And with you?
@jasonLLoren the one shaped like a dick
So, @time mentioned me. I don’t know how many of you that ever got mentioned by someone with 3 million followers, but it’s kinda intense.
@jkozuch selection process, and they wanted me to be first. So that I could embarrass us before it became a big deal, I guess.
@ribblefizz I’ll try, promise!
@PelleSK and I love you, dear citizen!
@itsawhat sure will! What do they look like?
@KC_theDonDada this is the best tweet I’ve ever got. Dude, what I think about Americans is that you’d ordinarily write stuff like that.
@jkozuch I’m seriously having the time of my life dude. I mean, even serbian papers have been writing about it.
@matbeeDOTcom no no, ass face. Didn’t you read my bio?
@servman well that’s a shame. My South Park-dominated impression of Canada is otherwise more, should we say dewy-eyed.
@PelleSK dude, I’m Sweden! If I say no, then there’s no turning back! There will be no Justin in Sweden, rejoice!
@servman what, on twitter or generally everywhere?
@missorian no YOU are!
@servman well, this accounts main target group is like, not swedes. So I think that’s pretty reasonable, don’t you agree?
@DasErdbeer asch, du är alldeles för vänlig!
@DasErdbeer you’re good at guessing
@dmitryn naaww, jag hjärta dig!
@BoomReactive oh it’s sweet all right
@HarryHung oh I’m sure!
@irenarco you’ve got swell flutes, man
@HarryHung Monday morning, fella! Til then I’m roaming this place.
@camilla_loyolla oh you’re welcome dear! Any other questions?
@jjbanday oh, now I get it. You’re a miss. Well excuse me ma’am!
@jjbanday wha? Uh all right, uh, duude mate braah!
@R00b_ that’s really more then enough, right?
@jjbanday why, hurray, good sir!
@edyong209 not personally, no. Why, do you have… Butter connections?
@NikkiGuest well, I’m gonna have to go ahead and answer 1. Yes and 2. No to that
@RealParenting close to central station, on Vasagatan. Google it!
If you want the same experience but cheaper, my tip is to just get drunk in your refrigerator.
You pay like $50, and for that you get one (1) Absolute Vodka drink to enjoy in the freezing cold.
Oh yeah, meant to tell you this earlier but forgot: if you ever come to Stockholm, do not – I repeat, do not – visit that worthless Ice Bar.
@ccombs love it! We are a country rich in web knowledge, but strangly enough still with poor web culture. We need all jokesters we’ve got.
@KseniaL well, right now that woukd be average Jacks, if you mind
@Citabel att jag ska representera Sverige, i egenskap av faktiskt vanlig svensk, denna vecka. Nästa vecka är det en annan representant.
@TDefren I sure am sir. As we say in Sweden: föttrö äl sogermurt i klampen darrflass.
@TDefren so my jokes here are not as subtle as they ordinarily would be. But I’m trying my best!
@TDefren but that was great too! About the profanities: when you tweet in a language that’s not your own, you tend to lower your standards.
@TDefren oh man, I was actually expecting a real love song, you know like backed with a guitar and stuff.
@JeroenBartelse why welcome, dear sir! I hope you’ll have a splendid time following my/our tweets.
@rivalg I guess I’m drinking a lot of coffee, lighting my face up with my laptop and hanging out w friends. Oh and, you know, masturbation.
@gvunson oh I’m sticking to the ordinary food times. It’s not like we hibernate during winter, we just feel a bit like cave men
This is the best youtube video I’ve seen all week: a couple of gay dads get to know they’re gonna be grand fathers http://t.co/EdNG4SEd
I guess that TheNextWeb piece did get me a little extra attention, huh? Well, here I am, all swedish and authentic and stuff. Questions?
@settostun man, thats kind! Thank you, and merry christmas! Or merry flooding for us swedes, I guess…
Oh, and now it’s raining. Thats great, Santa’ll just have to use a jetski instead of his standard transportation system http://t.co/mf8HKjNf
@gvunson around 9-10 in the morning. And it’s often cloudy. So we’ve got about 40 minutes of effective tanning time a day, I’d say.
@peroni0 well, personally, i dont plan on it in the near future. But as a spokes man for Sweden – I’m there already!
@settostun and I’m sure this week has helped a lot of people to draw their own conclusions!
@Almashdly and it’s only afternoon! Do you understand how extremely un-tanned swedes get during winter?
@2kronor it sure is!
@bieberdodah nej det är lite deppigt faktiskt
Do you guys even understand how dark it gets in Sweden around this time of year? This is how Stockholm looks at 4 pm: http://t.co/qt0B0gjS
As if the party wasn’t killed already: http://t.co/PWK7ow9c
According to their latest census, 0,3% of Pragues population identify themselves as Jedis. Wonder if ”the force” in this case is vodka.
@swedense no, a separate thing. Musikhjälpen, you know. Wrote a piece on it on Ajour.se yesterday, can advice you to read it.
Right now, Swedens biggest underground web forum Flashback is collecting money for charity. It’s indeed very beautiful and christmasy.
Update: SÄPO has now confirmed that the twitter account is fake. Well, I guess it was too good to be true anyway.
”Just hanging around in a sketchy bar, hiding my face behind a news paper with two holes in it.”
I’m really looking forward to SÄPO’s tweets though. ”Trying out fake moustaches”.
”Oh no, SÄPO is following me! I guess I’ll just have to stop planning all my terrorist attacks on Twitter.”
The swedish security service, SÄPO, is now on Twitter: @sapo_sverige. Imagine getting that email, ”SÄPO is now following you…”
Do watch this video essay on the Spielberg face, that awed expression all his characters show when cool stuff happens: http://t.co/e45fxl4T
@Fotosdepedro thank you man. It’s tough but also life.
This is how Google would look if SOPA passed: http://t.co/0759U7s9
Reddit user asks porn sites worldwide to shut down in protest against american suggested internet law SOPA: http://t.co/KsIcKVQk
Don’t know what to buy someone for christmas? Here’s a tip: a huge beetle, dressed as a Jurassic Park-character! http://t.co/HlGYtvCn
Some dude just retweeted me, adding ”only in Sweden”. My work here is done!
Do you love web culture? Then don’t miss out on my Spotify playlist ”Absolut Internetz – music from the memes”: http://t.co/fWLYAfRG
If your companys’ phone service line greets me with ”many are calling us right now, try later” and then hangs up on me – fuck you.
I guess it’s a bit like me, except their tweets would actually be interesting.
In a marketing campaign, homeless Stockholmers are now equipped with phones and asked to use Twitter to tell about their everyday life.
Cooking a whole meal only using a knife makes you first feel really manly, but then, when you think about it, like a brute.
Went jogging today. 1,7 km. My chest hurts, my mouth feels as if I’ve used a piece of iron as chewing gum. Might need to do this more often.
This is how motivated to work I feel today: http://t.co/CQwLDBDV
@sweden_cul and good morning to you, good sir
@sweden_cul thats probably very true!
If more people and companies had home pages like this, the world would be a more exciting place: http://t.co/1ju1X2oE
Tonight, I discovered Joe Cocker.
Just another spiritual evening along with my distinguished girlfriend: http://t.co/zYmj2RiN
@bramhults luckily not
@kristypea yes, it’s sad – but life. Thank you anyway
@viktoriansk I’m never buying her juice again!
Intention: hug my girlfriend. Result: she dropped her glass of juice all over the couch. Chaos ensued.
@Coop8640 until now, it seems.
Interesting when you forget to put a Google Hangout on ”private”, and random dudes starts to drop into your secret meeting.
@brettshilton true that. Yes, it’s sad but it’s also life.
@10vinz thanks, mate. Very kind of you.
I have changed my Facebook profile picture: http://t.co/G5DMU4lK
@AnnieTranslator and I’m sure she appreciated you!
@AnnieTranslator but it’s hard to appreciate that when you’re all about your own personal development
@rmschijffelen oh thank you
Sad that grandparents last years often take place when you’re a teenager and thus to stupid to realize the treasures of knowledge they hold.
@hejhim indeed! Nice to hear. Hälsningar från Reimers!
@AnnieTranslator oh yes, even if I kind of wished her last years wouldnt have corelated with my teenage years, when you’re so self-indulged.
@gvunson oh, thank you. You’re never ready to say those last things, even when you know you have to.
@hejhim it sure is! Thats where I live.
@ikkinenna our summers are wonderful! And I have a bathing platform just outside my door, which makes them even better.
@JKSthlm thank you
@thirzah thank you dear
I take joy in the fact that she was bright as a diamond, all the way up to her last hours. She was a truly amazing person, loved by many.
People get very old in this country, but no matter how old they are, it’s never easy to loose someone close to you.
Just got word that my grand-grandmother passed away tonight, just days before her 100th birthday. She will be missed.
THIS is how I, as a swede, ordinarily look in december: http://t.co/8zr7yWzT
For your information: this is not how Sweden traditionally looks in december http://t.co/uG1d8pSF
Cracked.com, brilliant as always: 7 bizarre trends that predict economic collapse: http://t.co/Glw0mGnV
@tommysollen I know, bought and viewed it the other day. Absolutely love the model of distribution!
You guys do know that Louis C.K, one of todays best stand-up comedians, is available on Spotify, right? http://t.co/bAJSgGio
Well, good night my dear swedish and none-swedish friends. Todays last fun fact: in swedish, it’s ”god natt”!
Last weeks biggest web & meme news – Google translated to english, for your pleasure: http://t.co/tQuGk8vr
Do you love the internets? I’ve written a piece about the last weeks biggest web virals and memes: http://t.co/cPlYwCBV
My clock’s trying to make me believe it’s only 4 pm. I think it’s lying: http://t.co/p3NImy4Z
On mondays, you guys should follow @Dodsmaskinen, because then he retweets spoiled american kids under the hashtag #fuckyoudadmonday.
Do you think my girlfriend is trying to tell me something? http://t.co/bfZIaGyR
”When the pope dies, is he being fired or promoted?”
Now, this is a kind of christianity I could actually appreciate: http://t.co/zBTeSeBQ
Well this is stupid: http://t.co/Kln2Nr2D
Prices of thousands of kronor (=hundreds of euros) per kg is reported. For butter. Seriously, WWII called and wants their black markets back
So, the mayor news story right now: the lack of butter in Norway. A black market has spawned, and butter is imported and selled ilegally.
@Beatrice108 great to hear that you think so!
I love it that my friend just commented another friends new HTC smartphone with ”what kind of big iPhone is that?”.
@AnnieTranslator why, you’re quite the detective!
@tinefuchs very nom indeed!
@AnnieTranslator i must say that your Twitter nick is very fitting
Drinking ”glögg” (a kind of sweet wine-based swedish christmas beverage) at a friends place: http://t.co/CVWBZ8aE
That’s like discovering that your right hand is killing tiny kittens without you knowing it, like while you’re asleep.
I’ll just be like ”JESUS christ, that’s terrible! Who the fuck are you? Get out of my head!”
I’ll just be minding own business, doing nothing, and my brain’s just ”well have you heard this one Jack…”
Sometimes my brain’s just frightening me to death. When it comes up with crazy racist jokes, for exemple.
Applying deodorant on the subway is great, the ladies think you’re fresh. At least judging by the amount of looks I get.
@moisesjules ah, you’re far too kind. I’m sure the next person up will be at least twice as witty and smart as I am.
@moisesjules i think we’re reaching a maximum confusion level here. No – everything written on leet language!
@Linda_FB in a week, next sunday. Tired already?
@moisesjules now THAT would be confusing!
I’m not sure this thing going on i Stockholm right now is even worthy of being called ”weather”.
Amazing interview with the social democrats party leader i todays Dagens Nyheter. It’s very hard not to like him, after all.
@AdrianaNSC youll be very confused, I can assure you that!
@Dianaalind I’m sure Sweden cant wait to rain on you when you arrive!
@AdrianaNSC well, you just sing a totally irrelevant song about strange nonsense, and then you drink. Thats about it.
@Lojsanlojs personally, no. Not at all. I dont think I can be clear enough om this: I dont like Justin Bieber.
@AnnieTranslator yeah, I’ve seen it and it’s very fitting. I think thats the exact confusion most foreign people feel around these things.
@Travelwriticus during winter time, they’re questionable. You could expect hours of delay. But now there isnt much snow, so it might work.
I love how certain beers puts a huge smile on my face just through how they smell. That, my friends, is beauty.
@Travelwriticus drinking beer, aannnd thats about it. With you?
@AnnieTranslator true words spoken!
@Travelwriticus all right but then it is ”this (specific) devise” I think
@KalleOskar well, no, but explaining it makes it sound silly. ”Well, we sing an irrelevant song before drinking liqeur and thats about it”
@Travelwriticus do you mean one specific item, or the general device?
Explaining the songs us swedes sing before we drink snaps to an american is hard. It sounds totally ridicolous.
@tommysollen diplomat! Extremely nice rooms though
I adore the decadence that only 50 ml Absolut Vodka à $18 straight outta a minibar can create: http://t.co/dQ9SwZlL
@saturndeeno they didnt like bad sex and slapstick, I guess. Well that makes two of us.
Visiting a hotel that’s so fancy I’d propably have to sell at least four vital organs to afford a beer. And that wouldnt even be a good one.
The thing I love the most about Sweden is not commuting on saturday nights, that’s for sure.
When you’re trying to find a place to eat, and the diversity of opinions in your company is so big you’re googling ”food”…
@mastefixapara i en vecka är det nog det. Det är ändå för mörkt för att ta schyssta skärmbakgrundsbilder av stan.
@mastefixapara jag gör faktiskt det här för mig och ingen annan!
@uaberu dude, eh, I think it was the finns. They got the world cup in it as well.
@EmilyStAubert haha, no problems. Good thing that you’re attentive!
@mastefixapara Oberbefehlshaber Roflmao!
@mastefixapara lol omg roflmao wtf
Well, ok, I’ll swede the LOT of you: meat balls äre guud, änd naked girls make me sæy ”jaa!”.
Noting that this account has lost about 40 followers since I took over. AM I NOT SWEDISH ENOUGH FOR YOU?!!
”Do I look like I care?”: http://t.co/6vFFqWLN
Actually, I don’t think George has any problems with the possible misinterpretations of this: http://t.co/5ZTzuUiZ
One hurt during demonstrations in Stockholm today. Her foot got run over by a police car by mistake. Sweden, country of the savages.
If i were just ten years younger, I’d build the shit out of these kids: http://t.co/2aT2NVxF
@APieterman to build or not to build, ya know
Drama in Legotown: http://t.co/U2V8JxuI
Kate Winslet and Leonardo diCaprio reenects their famous Titanic scene – in Lego: http://t.co/i3HUEGf2
Dubstep is the hangovers of music: intruding, a lot of people finds it highly uncomfortable, but it’s still kinda cool.
@AnnieTranslator a lot! Vinkar tillbaks
@AnnieTranslator lol, viftar is more like swinging than waving. Guess you mean the latter?
@cary1961 welcome! But do you remember that scene in Day after Tomorrow when everything freezes? The people in Lapland laughed at it.
@louisvzla nope! Instead thinking of going to that lego exhibition at skrapan
So, who are you guys? I mean, how many of you are swedes and thus as equally bad at english?
So, let us talk, minions. This is me, swedish marketer and writer, in my full glory: http://t.co/NBEyswcm
You’re following me because you’re interested in Sweden, right? Wrong! You’re interested in what I do! Thats what you’re interested in now.
Listen up, folks! I’m @kwasbeb, a regular swedish dude, and I’m taking over this goddamned account for a week! Expect bad sex and slapstick.
Googling ”cool english words”…
Well, I guess I’m the one calling the shots for this account now.