Natashja Blomberg
was @Sweden (2012-03-19 to 2012-03-25)

I’m a feminist and a socialist and I blog about parenting, gender roles, ideals at ladydahmer.se and tweet about everything I see and think at @ladydahmer. I have two kids that I raise gender neutral because I want them to have access to a hundred possibilities instead of one out of those two. I’m giving them the rainbow and not just pink or blue.

I’m not afraid to have an opinion or to speak up. I believe in being authentic, being true to who you are and what you believe in and not apologizing for it. I’m not afraid to be annoying or uncomfortable. For me it’s important to question peoples prejudices, expectations and also what goes on around me and to take discussions and conflicts even if it’s with people I care about. Some of the conceptions we have surrounding gender or race or sexuality is maintained by our own silence. I challenge myself and others to think outside the box and to look beyond personal beliefs.

@Sweden mars 25, 2012 19:51

Its not like i will forbidd them forever, but all in good time. Small kids should not be exposed to shit that can harm them.

@Sweden mars 25, 2012 19:50

Im a big fan of forbidding kids to do certain things. I wont provide porn, drugs, alcohol, smokes, sex or other things to them either.

@Sweden mars 25, 2012 19:37

“He stalks her, reminds her over and over again that he could ”lose control” and kill her…:|” and this is what teenage girls watch.

@Sweden mars 25, 2012 19:28

Not saying that disney is the sole reason for gender stereotypes etc. But disney is ONE small part of something bigger. Its a pussle.

@Sweden mars 25, 2012 19:25

All of you who are curious of my disney-loathing and want to understand more about my stance, youtube ”mickey mouse monopoly”.

@Sweden mars 25, 2012 19:18

And Ariel?Giving up her voice and preparing for pain and death to be with a man shes met ONCE?!!And he falls in love with her for her looks

@Sweden mars 25, 2012 19:17

No I wont let my kids watch beauty n the beast. It glorifies domestic abuse, kidnapping and the crazy notion that ”my love will change him!”

@Sweden mars 25, 2012 19:13

I loath Disney and traditional fairy tales. The consant theme is adult love and princsses waiting to be rescued by the prince.

@Sweden mars 25, 2012 19:12

Putting the kids to sleep. We’re watching Pippi. Im restrictive with TV. Most children show are very stereotype too. Or hetero normative.

@Sweden mars 25, 2012 19:07

Those of you who think i shouldve shown more pics of my country: google stockholm. For pics of the countryside, try ”delsbo”!

@Sweden mars 25, 2012 16:43

My husbands beard. Now that is not a big deal. Therefor few people feel the need to comment on it when i post a pic of it.

@Sweden mars 25, 2012 16:42

Is also interesting when people say ”of course people will react if you post a pic!” at the same time they say ”its not a big deal!”.

@Sweden mars 25, 2012 16:41

Its interesting that no one tells me im ”just looking for a reaction” when i post pics of my husband or friends.

@Sweden mars 25, 2012 15:54

If it wasnt a big deal, julia roberts unshaven pit and moniques unshaven legs wouldnt be in the tabloids and head news.

@Sweden mars 25, 2012 15:52

If it wasnt a big deal, i would be told by strangers that i need to shave. I would be told i look like a man or that im nasty or unfeminine.

@Sweden mars 24, 2012 21:47

I was born here by a swedish mother. My father is greek however and in sweden that means you will always be concidered ”not one of us”. Sad.

@Sweden mars 24, 2012 21:46

Oh no she didnt! My dinner guest just pulled the ”but youre not really swedish” on me. She joked but it is actually a common thing.

@Sweden mars 24, 2012 18:46

And lets stop talking about ”real” men and women. All men are real and all women are real. Regardless of looks or behaviour.

@Sweden mars 24, 2012 18:46

There is a belief that real men always wants sex and with anyone. This is wrong and creates huge pressure on young boys as well as grown.

@Sweden mars 24, 2012 18:45

Also, men who dont wanna have sex with everyone or all the time are not gays or unmanly. Stop putting stigma and shame on peoples sexuality.

@Sweden mars 24, 2012 18:38

Embrace your inner slut and fuck away! Men and women!Life is too short to deprive yourself from joy and pleasure.(only if you want that is.)

@Sweden mars 24, 2012 18:33

Swedish women have a slut reputation in other countries. This is because swedish women arent afraid to enjoy themselves without shame.

@Sweden mars 24, 2012 18:28

Those are the true faces of women haters. They will claim they ”love” us though but in reality, only if we fulfil a certain standard.

@Sweden mars 24, 2012 18:27

Fuck the madonna and whore complex! Grow up all of you who think you have the right to disrespect women based on how much sex we have!

@Sweden mars 24, 2012 14:32

In sweden all kids grow up with ”lördagsgodis”. Which means saturday candy. No candy other days. Ninja bought her own today.

@Sweden mars 24, 2012 13:19

“@michiexile: Really weird are the cultures where people wear shoes indoors AND have wall-to-wall carpets everywhere.” uhhh filthy! Yuk!

@Sweden mars 24, 2012 13:16

thing with lego and MY child is that when she has access to people and premade lego moduls,she plays different than if she only has blocks

@Sweden mars 24, 2012 13:10

I dont understand why you wear your shoes indoors?! Dont you get warm and sweaty feet? Bring in shit on your floors. Etc.

@Sweden mars 24, 2012 13:10

I dont understand why you wear your shoes indoors?! Dont you get warm and sweaty feet? Bring in shit on your floors. Etc.

@Sweden mars 24, 2012 13:09

”@carolynUK: Most Swedes won’t let shoes into their house…”” this is true. We take off our shoes when we enter our home.

@Sweden mars 24, 2012 13:09

”@carolynUK: Most Swedes won’t let shoes into their house…”” this is true. We take off our shoes when we enter our home.

@Sweden mars 24, 2012 12:25

I have deliberately just bought lego blocks, not figures or other models. (cars, trees, animals) Just blocks. I want her to BUILD.

@Sweden mars 24, 2012 12:10

Nazi logic: woman says immigrant rapists shouldnt be deported. Nazi gets angry cuz rape is serious crime. Also says he hope she gets raped.

@Sweden mars 24, 2012 09:42

Haha yeah i sound like a crazy immigrant through google! “@PenTroll: and for those that don’t there is always Google Translate :D”

@Sweden mars 24, 2012 01:51

We do however and unfortunatelly have a rasist party in our government. Dont ask me how the fuck that happened.

@Sweden mars 24, 2012 01:50

We have our share of racists and neo nazi pigs. But sweden is not anti-semitic or islamophobic as a general rule.

@Sweden mars 24, 2012 01:48

This is not true. “@Tikkunolam5772:I hear that Sweden is one of the worst Jew hating countries in the world.”

@Sweden mars 24, 2012 01:34

And now a break with something completely different for those of you who are to lazy to google swedish foods and such… (cont)

@Sweden mars 24, 2012 01:28

And those that do end up on the streets are usually broken people. Addicts. Alcoholics. Mentally ill. Theyre hard to help.

@Sweden mars 24, 2012 01:27

Most homeless people in sweden just dont have homes. (that theyre registered to) they live elsewhere. Few end up on the streets. Thank god.

@Sweden mars 24, 2012 01:20

People who have a choice dont beg. They dont sit in the freezing cold watchin people walk by them as if they werent there.

@Sweden mars 24, 2012 01:20

Some might argue that theyre only here to make easy money or hired by some obscure european maffia. But even they have to eat sometimes.

@Sweden mars 23, 2012 18:43

So what did i put in my burrito you wonder?! Sause made of soy, tomatoes, spices. (cinnamon, cummin, chili, paprika), vegetables. (cont.)

@Sweden mars 23, 2012 17:23

this is true. Ikea angers people. “@TweetweekUSA not sure if u watch 30 Rock, but they did an IKEA episode. It turns couples into enemies.”

@Sweden mars 23, 2012 16:37

Seriously. (yes still here) have you guys ever had erithrean food? If you havent you havent lived. Its. The. Best. Ever.

@Sweden mars 23, 2012 16:22

I think its important that we have a dialogue about the way we respond to eachother online. A lot of ugly comes out in people behind screens

@Sweden mars 23, 2012 16:22

Some people seem to think that ”freedom of speech” entitles you to say whatever you want to whoever you want.

@Sweden mars 23, 2012 15:52

I tried the slut thing once. Loved it. Juggled three men. One of them i married. End of sluttyness. Wish i had started sooner. It was great!

@Sweden mars 23, 2012 15:16

I dont know. I think there are some things that qualifies a true swede! Like we’re kinda distant. Soft spoken. (im greek btw) polite. Etc.

@Sweden mars 23, 2012 13:41

I dont let it pass though. Not bc i need to defend myself but because someone needs to stand up against bullies. Its fucking hammer time!

@Sweden mars 23, 2012 13:39

Or people who will argue ”cant you take critisism?!” when theyve said something shitty. Please dont confuse critisism with plain rudeness.

@Sweden mars 23, 2012 13:37

People who act like mean assholes for no reason and then excuse themselves with ”im just honest!”. No youre not. Youre an asshat.

@Sweden mars 23, 2012 12:43

I really hate critisism. I mean, why do people pretend they like it? I just wanna punch the person delivering it.

@Sweden mars 23, 2012 12:17

Trolls who spew negativity reminds me of negging losers. Being assholish to score points. Ive been around the block though. Not impressed.

@Sweden mars 23, 2012 10:53

Not that I dont understand the desire to hit the little bastards at times. I wanna hit my kids at least ten times a day. Never will though.

@Sweden mars 23, 2012 10:52

If you have to hit your child you have failed somewhere. No it doesnt make you a bad parent. But its bad parenting.

@Sweden mars 23, 2012 10:51

In sweden its illegal to spank or use any physical punishment on your children. This includes swat on the fingers, pinching, smacking.

@Sweden mars 23, 2012 10:16

I work fulltime. (blog, write articles, design websites) i have two children. Choirs. Friends. Interest. Work out. Mail to be replied to.etc

@Sweden mars 23, 2012 10:14

you who feel ignored because i havent replied to your tweets. Dont take it personal! I get HUNDREDS of tweets per hour. I just cant keep up!

@Sweden mars 22, 2012 22:14

Its like that movie the fog. First version 1980. Normal looking, even ugly, people. In their 30′s and 40′s. The remake: 20 year old models.

@Sweden mars 22, 2012 22:12

I want REAL people. I want to be able to identify with characters. I cant identify with fake lips, fake tans, silicone and perfection.

@Sweden mars 22, 2012 22:10

Dear hollywood. Stop making movies and series with unrealistic blue-teethed supermodels. I just cant watch shit like that. Ruins it.

@Sweden mars 22, 2012 21:55

Some question my love for Family Guy but the show is a satire. Boldly making fun of sexists, racists and other stereotypes and prejudices.

@Sweden mars 22, 2012 20:00

Ok, bring forth note pads and cameras. I will show my fridge in a minute. A GENUIN SWEDISH REFRIDGERATOR! (or however thats spelled)

@Sweden mars 22, 2012 18:04

Sure, one should be able to trust their partner but shit do happen. She/he can forget. Screw it up. Etc. Its serious business.

@Sweden mars 22, 2012 17:55

And if you chose not to protect yourself during sex, then whos responsability is it when you or your partner becomes pregnant?

@Sweden mars 22, 2012 17:54

If you dont want to become a parent, why do you leave the question of protection on someone else? Is it worth the risk?

@Sweden mars 22, 2012 13:23

The weather is wonderful today! Warm winds and sun! When the first sun comes, swedes throw their clothes. You can see sun bathers i april.

@Sweden mars 22, 2012 11:14

And about age and when to wean. For some reason feeding your newborn is ok but it suddenly becomes perverted after a certain age.

@Sweden mars 22, 2012 10:39

When i had my first baby breastfeeding was hard. She would kick, scream, not latch on properly etc. I was nervous and stressed and panicked.

@Sweden mars 21, 2012 23:41

the new fast zombie was brilliant in dawn of the dead. I mean what the fuck is scary about someone walking slower than my grandma?

@Sweden mars 21, 2012 23:32

If you like post-apo and slow you need to watch the brittish series ”survivors”. I loved it. No zombies though. Just deadly flu killing all.

@Sweden mars 21, 2012 22:58

I see curse words as enriching our language. They put colours to our sentences. Words are not bad. Its the way theyre used that is.

@Sweden mars 21, 2012 22:53

Its just not logical that half of the group wouldnt contribute. (women) its not logical that they wouldnt fight too.

@Sweden mars 21, 2012 22:50

Specially shit. Even kids. Doesnt raise eyebrows. It surprises me that it offends some. Not my intention. Just the way i talk.

@Sweden mars 21, 2012 22:49

Three people have asked why i ”use profanities”. Not saying that swedes do that a lot, but generally people here use words as fuck and shit.

@Sweden mars 21, 2012 22:33

It really pisses me off in zombie movies that the people are so fucking stupid. Like walking dead. WHO THE HELL LET THEIR KIDS ROAM FREE?!!

@Sweden mars 21, 2012 20:13

Husband decorates. He bought the curtains and pillows and lamps and is the interior nazi of this family. Yes he is a gem. I make the mess.

@Sweden mars 21, 2012 20:04

So who wanna visit a pretty un-ordinary swedish home? Im afraid that my home doesnt look like IKEA but its warm and welcoming!

@Sweden mars 21, 2012 16:35

when your kid is playing with a kid of the opposite sex; do you sat theyre in love? Joke about marriage? Force heteronorms down its throat?

@Sweden mars 21, 2012 15:40

Can you guess my stance on breastfeeding? Long term? Public? Or maybe ill tweet about ice cream. I really like ice cream. We’ll see!

@Sweden mars 21, 2012 13:29

Also, in countries where abortion is illegal, the abortion rate is basically still the same as countries where its legal.

@Sweden mars 21, 2012 13:27

Also a lot of those who argue that abortion is murder will still be ok with it if the woman was raped. Is it less murder then?

@Sweden mars 21, 2012 13:19

I dont know about you guys but i have done a lot of irresponsible shit. Sometimes you make stupid choices. Drunk, horny, ”wont happen to me”

@Sweden mars 21, 2012 13:18

And this holier than thou thing people got going on; ”well you shouldve made sure you didnt get pregnant to start with!”

@Sweden mars 21, 2012 13:09

Anyone who has had an abortion know its not a walk in the park. I doubt anyone who is healthy and feel ok would do more than necessary.

@Sweden mars 21, 2012 13:08

Although thus idea that some women use abortion as birth control is a myth. Women who do multiple either are overly fertile or depressed.

@Sweden mars 21, 2012 13:04

Its not possible to be afather against your will unless you were raped. But a lof of men put the responsability of protection on the woman

@Sweden mars 21, 2012 13:03

Ive got news for them; if you know how babies are made and you still stick your dick in a woman you know shit could happen.

@Sweden mars 21, 2012 13:02

In sweden we do have a problem with abortion almost being expected of the woman. A lot of men claiming to ”be a father against my will”.

@Sweden mars 21, 2012 12:58

is an unwanted child supposed to be a punishment? Oh you fucked and didnt protect yourself so here you go bitch! Nah.

@Sweden mars 21, 2012 12:55

Some might argue that if you fuck up (forget protection etc) you should take responsability but abortion IS being responsible.

@Sweden mars 21, 2012 12:53

Abortion was suggested. Ive had a few myself. Not for fun as some pro-lifers might suggest but because it was the best choice at the time.

@Sweden mars 21, 2012 12:50

Ok. No more hair tweets. For now. On to somethig else? How would you feel about menstruation? Too much? Just checking.

@Sweden mars 21, 2012 12:49

Cant really take credit for that one. One of my swedish followers tweeted it. Just so you know. But we can pretend.

@Sweden mars 21, 2012 12:49

If the untamed natural female body ”look like a mans” what do the natural male body look like? Dog? Woman? Truck?

@Sweden mars 20, 2012 15:49

Must everything a feminist do be feminist? “@mejadesign: is it really feminist to post photos sitting on the toilet?”

@Sweden mars 20, 2012 14:37

Its funny though this attention whore business. My blog used to be called ”confessions of a neurotic attention whore”!

@Sweden mars 20, 2012 14:08

Sure, looks matter in the real world. But this is sweden. People that looks like me (tattoos, piercings) can get a job in most places.

@Sweden mars 20, 2012 14:01

Those of you who wonder about the ”i dont tell my kid shes pretty”. i comfirm and SEE her i. Lots of other ways. She knows shes fantastic.

@Sweden mars 20, 2012 13:58

A lot of people tells me that me not complimenting my daughters looks will damage just as much. But no one says the same about my son.

@Sweden mars 20, 2012 13:56

My way of raising enables the child to be either way, regardless of gender. Theres nothing boyish or girlish, both roles are available.

@Sweden mars 20, 2012 13:56

Although its kind of ok for girls because thats a step up. A boy being like a girl is stepping down because girly stuff are worth less.

@Sweden mars 20, 2012 13:56

A girl who doesnt wear dresses or pink or play with dolls but rather like to do typical boy things are a tom boy. (= not a ”real” girl)

@Sweden mars 20, 2012 13:56

A boy who likes pink or dolls and dont want to climb trees or wrestle will be concidered wrong. Girly. Sissy. Gay. (= not a ”real” boy)

@Sweden mars 20, 2012 13:56

If youre a girl youre supposed to act and dress and look and be a certain way. And if youre a boy you should fulfil the boy role.

@Sweden mars 20, 2012 13:55

Most people have expectations and prejudices about boys n girl which influence and affect the way we respond to them.

@Sweden mars 20, 2012 13:27

”The word pretty is unworthy of everything you will be, and no child of mine will be contained in five letters.”

@Sweden mars 20, 2012 13:27

”When you approach me, begging, “Mom, will I be pretty?” I will wipe that question from your mouth like cheap lipstick and answer NO!”

@Sweden mars 20, 2012 13:22

Even when we say, ”Youre pretty as you are,” our minds are still on image, image, image – and we’re passing this onto our kids.

@Sweden mars 20, 2012 13:22

Just think about that for a moment: what does it tell little girls about themselves if their looks or clothes is the first thing we notice?

@Sweden mars 20, 2012 13:21

I dont want to teach her that her looks matter. But if i talk about it it makes her believe it has importance.

@Sweden mars 20, 2012 13:20

I never tell Ninja she looks pretty or that her clothes are pretty. I dont compliment her when she has nailpolish or when she wears a dress.

@Sweden mars 20, 2012 12:42

But when others value me for not following the norm it pisses me off. That stubborn three year old in me sets her foot down and screams NO!

@Sweden mars 20, 2012 12:41

its up to every man or woman what to do. Shave, dont shave. Wear make up or dont. I dont put any judgments or values in that.

@Sweden mars 20, 2012 12:41

I dont have to worry about my sweaty smell annoying others on the train. No one will sit next to me. Thats the swedish way. We. Never. Do.

@Sweden mars 20, 2012 12:37

Breaking old norms doesnt mean we should create new ones. I didnt stop shaving because i think its wrong to shave.

@Sweden mars 20, 2012 11:11

Sometimes Im asked why I dont shave. The answer is obvious. For the same reason that I dont put a bucket on my head or paint my toes blue.

@Sweden mars 20, 2012 09:39

Cosleeping do promote and build attachment though so if youre a parent that is away from home a lot, start sleeping with your kids!

@Sweden mars 20, 2012 09:34

Besides adults cosleep. Imagine the look on husbands face if i told him it was time to start sleeping in his own bed!

@Sweden mars 20, 2012 09:33

How long will we cosleep you ask? For as long as the kids want. I believe an abundance of closeness build independent kids.

@Sweden mars 19, 2012 22:10

My first day is at its end. This was a lot of fun! Great followers, great challenge. Tomorrow Ill show you my favorite part of stockholm.

@Sweden mars 19, 2012 19:49

Im married to a younger man. A lot younger apparently because the other day when I was playing Maiden he asked “who are you listening to?”

@Sweden mars 19, 2012 18:17

And on top of all my husband just called and told me he is bringing home indian food! Tikka butter masala. HURRAH!

@Sweden mars 19, 2012 14:43

The panic you feel when you’re late to pick up your kid at daycare and you need to take a shit before you leave. Crap. (pun intended)

@Sweden mars 19, 2012 14:17

Hey all men, dont worry about the rabid-ness i got going on. Just wait until i get started on the confinement of the male gender role!

@Sweden mars 19, 2012 14:15

The idea that shaving is something you activly have to stop. Im not trying to not shave I couldnt be more passiv.

@Sweden mars 19, 2012 14:13

This whole idea that being a woman requires you to change your looks and body. No, i didnt stop shaving because i want to be a man.

@Sweden mars 19, 2012 14:11

Women dont become angry because theyre ugly. We become angry because we’re treated like second rate citisens.

@Sweden mars 19, 2012 14:10

One thing that irks me is the prejudice that all feminists are just ugly women who cant get a man. And therefor is for womens rights. Eh.

@Sweden mars 19, 2012 14:09

I enjoy discussing politics, serial murder, gender roles, breastfeeding and everything in between. I have an opinion about everything.

@Sweden mars 19, 2012 14:08

Im an arrogant know-it-all. (No, but I really do know it all) I’m slightly fat, happily married and a mother of two brats.

@Sweden mars 19, 2012 13:17

A comment in my blog: ”genital hair is not hygienic! Shave!” I’m always fascinated by men who gives me advice how to care for my vagina.

@Sweden mars 19, 2012 11:27

Tamlin is actually a scottish name. I read it in a book when i was 13 and decided then to name my kid just that.

@Sweden mars 19, 2012 11:21

I try to dress them in a way that doesnt generate focus on their looks. I want them to be oblivious to vanity for as long as possible.

@Sweden mars 19, 2012 11:19

I notice a huge difference how my kids gets treated depending on the clothes they were. If theyre pink or cute they get a lot of compliments

@Sweden mars 19, 2012 11:16

I try to raise them free from gender specific expectations. (”girls are this, boys are that”) I want them to be just KIDS. Not genders.

@Sweden mars 19, 2012 10:14

I’ll probably tweet a lot about ideals and norms of our society, gender roles, parenting, feminism and maybe a little rocknroll.

@Sweden mars 19, 2012 10:08

I also like to come with a little warning. I’m crude, boisterous and vulgar. But totaly lovable. You’ll love me in no time!